Fall apart inside
by Lockerz
Summary: Without Riza how can Roy live? 'Without you I am nothing, so please never leave me,' A little chapter 99-102 story.
1. He falls

**Hey it's just me :) This will be a two chapter fic and I'll update the next chapter tomorrow. Just a little idea I know it's just a recap of 99/ 100/ 101 and maybe 102 chapters from Fullmetal Alchemist but with some of my own little bits so enjoy :)**

**Disclaimer: I do not own FMA **

_**CONTAINS SPOILERS!**_

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She turns and looks at him; the smile she only uses for him grows wider, crumpling the soft amounts of skin surrounding her lips.

His smile too is wide but holds a sense of unease as he leans forward and takes her hand. He can still hear Scar and Edward whispering mutedly close by but he doesn't care as he pulls her into his embrace.

He has waited too long and now he knows they are in danger, a danger that may result in the cost of both of their lives.

He cannot bear the thought of her dying and leaving him alone but he also knows if he is the one to fall away she will take her own life.

At this thought he merely smiles and pushes it thought aside and recalls roughly what he once told Hughes all those years ago 'A man that thinks of his loved ones on the battle field is the first to go,'

He can still remember his friend's steady gaze as he looked down at the letter than brought him so much. He knows that the woman in front of him has always been there for him ever since they met.

He can still remember her shy smile, the one she would give him when she would stray from her room and they would meet in the corridor or the brief glances they would exchange as she set down his dinner plate. The memory comes to his mind from the day he left the Hawkeye mansion, vividly remembering the way he slowly opened her door only to see her curled on her bed with her cheeks stained with tears. Such pure tears. He catches sight of a photograph upon the bedside table and looks at the black and white image for ever frozen within the dirty frame. His dark eyes had fallen first upon a young girl with long hair and large eyes, at her side an attractive woman and he instantly knows this is her mother and Riza as a young girl and in that moment she had turned to him and could see he was coming to say goodbye.

Now as he stands before him in the dark of the underground passage and can see the mix of excitement and fear in her auburn eyes, he realises why he needs her so much. They are the eyes he has watched but never fully understood so many times.

There is a faint bang from overhead, the distant sounds of a last resort attempt to seize control in the city above.

Gasps from the oldest Elric brother and the Ishbalan drift towards them from around the corner meaning that have heard it too.

It falls silent and the blonde woman runs her hand up her arm. It comes to rest delicately upon the wound Envy has given her moments minutes ago.

He can still see the pain in her face, hidden by the stone mask that she so often wears. He is one of the few people she truly trusts and he sees her as who she really is.

He can still recall her words _'I have no desire to live a carefree, happy life alone. After this battle, my body will leave this world together with the Flame Alchemy that only brings insanity.'_

A pained expression crosses his face and she knows that he is thinking, she can always tell and as she wraps her fingers around his he merely nods and knows she is making him a silent promise to keep on protecting him.

"Come on, we need to go," The voice echoes down the tunnel and Roy recognizes it as Edward's.

"Lieutenant," Roy's voice is calm, despite what he knows they are going to do. She just nods, already knowing what he is going to say.

"Let's go," Her voice passes through her lips as a mere breath and she turns and walks back down the tunnel towards the other two men.

He takes his time as he walks forwards; he rubs his hands together causing a small spark, which merely fades as quickly as it came.

He reaches the other three and nods shortly. They began to walk, their strides long and sure. A door looms at the end of the dimly lit corridor; the wall seemed to be closing in behind them as if forcing them to go through it.

They step into the room with great care. He watches Riza admirably as she readies her gun, her eyes falling upon something in the centre of the room. Roy follows her gaze as if it is second nature.

"Who are you?" Edward asks, his eyes flickering towards the man that has just appeared in a beam of light. The flame alchemist's eyes widen as the gold-toothed doctor explains who he is and his hand moves to his gloves, checking they are pulled on properly.

"Which means you're on their side," The words leave Roy's lips sour and distasteful as if the words have burnt his tongue.

Riza knows what he is about to do. The doctor smiles widely and begins to speak. Before any of them can react, men begin to fall through the hole in the large pipes above the gold-toothed man.

There isn't time to react properly so they disperse as best they can. As usual Riza runs to her superior's side.

Words are tossed back and forth through the air but the members of the room keep standing, fighting the unsuccessful Bradley's with all they've got.

A space clears as a Bradley runs forward and Riza turns, spotting the gap. Her gun is raised in seconds and she fires, only for the bullet to be intercepted and lodged in the chest of a puppet's body.

Roy turns, followed by Edward and Scar as the doctor begins to re-call five of the men, wtching with curiosity as they gather around him.

Minutes pass like a blur and Edward is gone and the puppets are charging forward again, their faces void of any emotion but they are there to kill.

The sound of bullets fill the air as Riza shoots at the oncoming opposition. Too late. She is forced to the ground, the firearms fall from her fingers and she becomes useless under the muscular form of the Bradley.

Roy looks on and in his worry he falters, letting the target duck and in turn is knocked down as well. His dark eyes fall upon the blonde woman who is held tightly around the neck, a sword pressed to her throat.

A feeling of unease builds within him. _I knew I shouldn't have let her come, _he quickly realises this statement is stupid and he surveys his own hold._ Why are they only holding my arms? _He asks himself, looking again at her hold.

"I need you to do a little transmutation and open the gate!" The man speaks loudly, Riza shivers at the words, sensing the darkness behind them.

"What?" The Colonel's eyes widen as he speaks, the whole situation is overwhelming and he gazes at the man from his place on the floor.

"It doesn't matter who, a dead parent, a lover, a friend," The man's chuckle that accompanies the word causes the black haired man's face to twist in pain.

He goes through each title quickly naming them to a person. _A lover? _A lump forms in his throat and he looks out of the corner of his eyes at the only woman in the room sadly.

She is to his left, watching on intently, not showing a sign of the fear that is overpowering her inside because she is Riza Hawkeye and fear means weakness in her eyes.

She flinches as Maes' name is used, knowing all to well Roy will fall apart if this is to continue. Roy asks a question, Riza can tell by the tone of his voice although she does not catch his precise words as her head is snapped back by her captor.

"The Gate will stay closed!" The firmness is Roy's voice makes Riza close her eyes for a brief second knowing that he is staying strong.

"There's no more time," The gold toothed man demands and Riza begins to panic, although she must stay calm for her superior's sake and she knows it. Her will is stronger than her emotions and always has been.

The words resound in her head and the world begins to spin.

The sword presses harder against her neck and she feels blood trickle down her neck before pain envelopes her torso and she falls forward. Roy watches on as blood splatters onto the dirty floor.

The world spins. He watches her crash heavily against the cement. It's over. His heart begins to race and it dawns upon him.

"LIEUTENANT!" The words resound off the walls, bouncing back into his own ears. He hears the weakness in his own voice and his eyes open wider.

The doctor's words are a mess to him and he knows what he must do.

His life is flashing before him; every moment he has ever shared with Riza is as vivid as her bloody body on the floor.

He knows that every moment he spends thinking is being wasted.

He can't help himself and he screams her name again.

As the picture of losing her flashes across his mind, all he has ever been begins to fall apart.

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**Whoa :D**

**Well please review I shall be so honoured if you do I love getting reviews seriously so I was quite proud of this so I'd love to be reviewed and get feedback.**

**Thanks Again**

**-Amie**


	2. She falls

**Second chapter of this fic. I have no idea why I did it, I just did :)**

***SPOILERS***

**Disclaimer: I do not own FMA**

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He's breaking and he knows he is. He can hear his own heart beat thundering in his ears as he watches, disgusted, as they drag her body over the rough ground.

He wants to scream and run but he can't because they still have hold of him. They drop her carelessly and the doctor is standing there, glancing from his body to hers.

"LIEUTENANT, HANG IN THERE!" He yells at the top of his lungs, already forcing himself not to break down. He knows he must stay strong for her sake. "Can you hear my voice? Answer me Lieutenant!" He demands and struggles against the puppets that are holding him, making a frantic attempt to get to her.

"I wonder if you've decided then Mustang," The voice of the Doctor is like acid to the black man's ear and he pulls even more frantically against his captors.

"You bastards!" The growl is low and animal and Roy can feel a vein pulsing above his brow. He demands she answer him then repeats her title frantically in a desperate attempt to waken her.

He gasps as her eyes open briefly before they close once again. He has seen in that brief moment that the usually bright brown is fading as well as the colour on her face.

The Doctor speaks again, and he refers to her as 'This woman' and Roy growls, knowing that he should give her a name, she deserves it. Although he regrets never saying it much himself.

He blinks rapidly as she speaks, although her words are broken and rushed as if she is running out of air. "I won't die...." she pauses and Roy blinks again, the wait to hear her speak again is agonizing but when she does again, his body relaxes slightly. "I've been ordered not to die you see," she states and Roy feels both a mixture of pride and admiration for the beautiful woman run through him.

The doctor merely dismisses her words with a few of his own and turns his attention to the flame alchemist again. He nods shortly but not noticeably on the word precious.

It is the first time he is seeing her in her true light. He has always known she is the bravest person he has ever met but this exceeds all of those occasions.

He continues to speak and Roy's frown widens greatly as the choice begins to weigh heavier upon him. Roy's eyes widen in confusion as the gold-toothed man's hand disappears into his jacket.

His grin has grown malicious and the words hit Roy like a train. 'Philosophers stone' Roy gasps slightly and realises the key to saving her life is within the man's hand.

He gulps and watches a the Doctor looks down. "Oh? She's become quiet. I wonder if she's dead." His words are cold as they hit Roy's ears and the black haired man lurches forward.

He wants to draw his gloves and snap. He wants to smell the man's flesh burning because of his own doing. He wants to hear his screams as the fire draws the life from his pathetic body.

The feeble words leave Riza's lips in a last attempt to right his path as she has always done. "There's no need to do Human Transmutation," she states although the Doctor ignores her and continues to pressure Mustang.

The black haired man does not look at him but instead at his blonde subordinate and suddenly he catches her eye. Her look is firm and unfathomable and he bites his lip in an attempt to understand. Her pupil darts to the left and his own eyes widen greatly. He knows what he must do and it's breaking his heart.

"I get it," Roy finally admits, still keeping his eyes on her for a few more seconds. He begins to speak and the Doctor speaks back. Riza looks on weakly, a rush of happiness flowing through her body as she imagines that Roy has actually got her message. Her eyes close and she hears gasps around the room but she cannot open her eyes, even now.

Roy gasps and watches as the Doctor disappears. The bottle the man had previously been holding drops from the hole in the ceiling. He can hear someone speaking but cannot match it to a name.

"IN THIS PLACE RIGHT NOW, I'M THE ONLY DOCTOR THAT CAN USE ALCHEMY! IF YOU KILL ME YOU WONT BE ABLE TO SAVE THAT GIRL! DO YOU UNDERSTAND?" Roy recognises this voice as the Doctor's but it is strangled as if he is being held by something.

Suddenly, figures begin to drop to the floor and a chimera reaches his arm protectively over Riza. A young girl swoops down and throws some metal objects at the guard holding Roy and without thinking he breaks free, stabbing one of the puppets through the neck with its own sword. He lurches forward for the philosopher's stone but it is kicked away.

He clicks, sending fire at a failed Bradley as he screams for them to move. He is standing metres away from Riza and he skitters to a halt as a large man swings down through the pipes and lands before him.

Without much care for whom he is right now he drops to his knees and introduces himself to the newcomer as quickly as he can. He pulls the blonde woman into his arms and calls her title, begging for her to open her eyes frantically.

The young girl appears again and tells Roy to leave it to her as she begins to draw a circle from his Lieutenant's blood. She finishes and the transmutation circle begins to glow around the Lieutenant's neck. She shifts.

Roy breathes out heavily, half relieved but he knows it isn't over yet. He calls her yet again as the young girl tells him she has stopped the bleeding. He does not think but instead pulls his best friend into his arms and embracing her tightly. "I'm sorry, thank you," His voice is merely a whisper for only her to hear and he pulls her tighter. He can feel the heat emanating from her body and begs to feel her heartbeat.

She begins to speak and he tells her not to. She does anyway and her tone is casual as if nothing has just happened. "My eye signal. You recognized it well,"

"We've been together for a long time after all," A sense of ease washes over him, maybe it's her voice and maybe it's the fact he has just held her in his arms in front of other people.

"Besides, if you do human transmutation, I'll beat you to death," She chuckles and he nods, smiling at her sense of humour at a time like this. He knows that many people do not know that she is a funny person but to him she is the person that always manages to put a smile on his lips.

She breaks a smile as Roy states he knew what her stare was saying. It is a smile he loves. He wishes he could tell her he could protect her forever but he can't.

Just as Roy's heart begins to slow he spots the man he resents most standing across the chamber. His arm is tight around Riza's shoulder and yet again he knows that he is going to put his life on the line again. Riza watches intently as her Colonel and the Fuhrer pass words between each other.

"But the current me has people to stop me and people to point me in the right direction," Roy's mind is full of thoughts of Riza. She has changed him and now he can't imagine life without her.

Minutes pass by and the room becomes fuller, Pride's presence is not welcome and blood now stains the room completely. Roy watches as the real Bradley charges, his speed not even matched by the mere puppets from before.

Roy growls and places the Lieutenant in the care of the large black haired chimera. This is it, Roy has wanted this moment for so long but before he can click he is pinned.

Agony shoots up his arms as Bradley's swords pierce his gloved hands. He can hear the blonde woman screaming for him but can hear a scuffle as she is held back only to be followed by a loud gasp as he watches her being lifted, shadows surrounding her and the Chimera.

Roy watches helplessly as the scene becomes clear far too fast around him. 'Sacrifice,' He suddenly begins to realise and he knows it is over now as Bradley speaks and the circle around him begins to crackle and spark into life.

He hears the words of Pride, far away but far too close as he states there is no time left. He struggles in vain as Bradley leaves the circle on the instructions of the 'young boy'.

_No, no I can't leave him here with Riza!_Roy begs in his head.

Riza screams his title again but she is held back only to watch as her beloved man disappears in a flurry of sparks and she watches as the Fuhrer looks on.

The man Roy longs to be. The title she has sworn to help him towards. Words pass as a blur and she only watches as Bradley steps forward, his swords crossed. He begins to go through each of their titles and he finally comes to hers.

"Mustang's loyal dog," she is proud to have such a name even though anyone else would recoil angrily. The fact she is merely associated with him is good enough and now it dawns on her that Mustang has gone and she has no idea what has happened to him and in that moment, the moment she has feard for far too long. It is then she begins to fall apart.

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**Thanks for reading :D**

**Please review, I love getting reviews they make my day :D**

**Oh my God I hate the weeks wait between Brotherhood episodes and the next few episodes will be racked with Royai (GOD PLEASE GRANT US THIS)**

**-Amie**


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